I picked up the guitar and started singing all those old folk songs American’s love, like The Hammer Song etc. I realized they were all all labor songs from an era that has passed.
They do not seem relevant. So I wrote a song about modern life.
The Costco Song is more about how we live our lives today, how abysmal the experience of going to Costco really is, the promise of a bargain only means we acquire more than we can consume, more than we need at the register, and much if it goes bad in our garage.
COSTCO is sort of the Anti-Nordstrom. A horrible shopping experience, no help, just on your own no matter what. Carts fly about as their pilots are desperate to escape with massive quantities of consumer goods marked “Kirkland”.
As I was just about to publish this song the coronavirus struck. I had heard stories about what Costco looked like since the outbreak, but when my Dad innocently suggested we visit the store to buy razor blades we were not prepared for the mayhem. Oh the humanity.
Here are the lyrics if you want to sing along:
Lets all go to Costco..
Let’s buy more than we need…We’ll load it up in our SUV’s
It will go bad in our garage.
Let’s all go to Costco…
Let’s buy 1000 batteries…our children will inherit these,
They’ll turn green in our garage.
Gluttony is a sin, but we over consume. We will stop buying, when we run out of room….
Lets all go to Costco…
Let’s line up for gasoline.. Shell and Chevron are beyond our means,
We can’t park in our garage.